past.
Just because I haven't listened to my songs lately, cuz I broke mi earphones, doesn't mean I have to feel heartache~. Like what is that? I thought I'm done, but why did I feel pain? He did nothing wrong (?), and I did nothing wrong.
Ok, this is what happened. I was just on my bed and I was listening to my "lullaby" playlist. Practically, HALF (or most) of the songs in that playlist we both share together, only because they are good songs, like c'mon, who wouldn't share good songs to his/her friends right? And when I heard them again after like a week or two. . . sigh. . . I dunnoe mang. Liek my heart felt like it sank and I started thinking about him. So like an hour or two later I woke up listening from Big Bang's A Fool's Only Tears, which is like one of my favourite songs of all time~ WHOOT!!!...(yeaa.. off topic right there... Moving on~~) Uhm... I remembered Josh told me the he told him that I like "asian" guys, if ya noe what I mean, cuz like he was asking Josh about me (? wait, was that how it went?) and like my eyes popped wide open when that memory came back in my mind. I was like...QQ. And like I remembered a couple of other things back spring/summer and yeaaah.... MAJOR QQ!!!
Like what is this?! I swear I only see him as a brother now. But then I remember as well, when we were at sq1 with don and kuma, I heard him say to don something about blah blah blah she only sees me as a big bro so I can't ask her out nonsense. Is he talking to me or some other girl? I didn't catch the whole convo!! @___@ . . . Oh gosh I sound like and evesdropper/creeper. But I wanna know~~~ QQ
So tell me, do I miss him? Do I need closure? Or is it cuz I'm just remembering all these things because of those songs he gave me? Or I just can't fully let go of him? Q______Q. I dunno anymore. Like there are nights, lately as well, that he's in it and like we chill like it was our fist time meeting each other, and sometimes I'm like slow dancing with him or whatevah. OMG I CAN'T BELIEVE I JUST TYPED THAT?!?!?!*blushed and embarassed* I wonder if he ever thinks of me whenever he listens to the songs I gave him during summer. I wonder if I'm ever in his dreams? Why do I sound such a girly? @_____@''' kyaaaah~~>< I have to stop!!! @__@''
SOMETHING IS WRONG WITH ME!!! QQ
Anyway, I just hafta let that out...@___@ cuz I feel weird in my head ~
-JD
